Not in our name either

Cindy McDonagh says:

I was brought up by strict parents in a family of 10. We went to church every week and were not allowed to swear! My older sisters were never allowed to wear makeup, not even a bit of lipstick.
Never mind wear revealing clothes, but that was some time ago maybe 15 years or more, this changed for me with time. I had a job, phone, and could drive, would get away with a little make up, but by god if I attempted to wear provocative clothing at home, never mind to a wedding or event!!! I won’t even tell you what would happen! Now I am not trying to paint a perfect picture, we didn't have it good we went through what most traveller families go through.

I never heard of a GRAB until I got married, none of my family believed in grabs in the past and have not taken on this silly made up tradition today either. My in laws don't believe in this thing, but knew of it.

I feel Channel 4 have portrayed my community as though it is acceptable to beat a woman for a kiss! This is sexual assault and is and should be seen this way. I don't care who believes in this tradition this is not mine or my extended family. I am trying to bring up two girls in the best way that I can and worry that they will be seen as some brain washed domestic slave for their family or husband.

 I do not dress my girls provocatively, nor ever will. Channel 4 could have shown the traditional smocking dress and painted shoes. But they obviously wanted to create a stir. They should have also made it quite clear that not all travellers believe in grabs. I watch this show every week with the humiliation starting before the program.

 I’m on the phone to my family humiliated at facing the public the next day. The neighbours and school teachers know I am a traveller. What do they think about me after watching this program? Channel4 has made young Traveller woman look like sluts and men violent. Where were the parents when these young girls were being grabbed?

I know that this defiantly doesn't happen in the Irish Traveller weddings I go to, and I go to allot every year. What most concerns me is what my girls will have to face in the future because the way they have been portrayed!  This program will definitely create more race/hate crime against my community. I didn't have a big fat wedding! I don't have to ask my partners permission to go to a shop!

I work. I am a qualified beautician! I want my children to have a good education, I want my girls to be independent, I may not be every Irish Traveller but My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding isn’t either!

Eddie McDonagh (who is unrelated to Cindy) says:

I am sick of the way that the Irish Travellers and Romany Gypsies’ are betrayed on Channel Four’s – My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. I am an Irish Traveller and have never in my life seen or heard as much rubbish about our people.

I have four of my family married. None of them ever went grabbing or danced in such a way that they looked like dirty girls to anyone. I know from all my family and other Travellers and Romany Gypsies all over England and Ireland that this is not how we live our lives. Some Irish Travellers on Channel Four’s – My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding had no right to say that all Irish Travellers and Romany Gypsies behave like this when we know this is not true.

 I hope that other true Irish Travellers and Romany Gypsies will join us on this matter so that Channel 4 can get their facts right.